(1) Sun Jan 07 12:05:46 PST we are idiots:

We're back in LA after a 3.5 week time away. We are idiots. We don't have renter's insurance because we're slackers. I think "renter's insurance" is one of the most advanced levels of the game "Escape From Slackerdom". That game starts when you start college, and the levels get harder or more unlikely for you to complete as the game progresses. The first level is "1: Don't Skip Classes," then "2: Do the Reading For Your Classes," then "3: Get A Decent Amount of Sleep Each Night," then one of the Boss characters is "The Taxman," where you have to do your own taxes for the first time, etc. Anyway, one of the last levels is "24: Get Renters Insurance" and we haven't.

We also neglected to tell our neighbor that we would be gone for three weeks. AND there were workmen in our apartment fixing the plumbing when we left. So basically, we're idiots and worried about it all vacation.

When we got back last night, everything in the apt. was really dusty... but it looked like it was all here.

Looking around, we saw that the workmen left the kitchen window wide open. There's a screen, but still, it's the window that's above our porch, which is only 6 feet off the ground. Then last night I thought they left another window open... and... they did! Then, this morning, and this is the kicker.. the porch door was NOT UNLOCKED and was actually cracked open about a half inch!!!1!!!

At this point I'm glad the place was so dusty because it was pretty obvious that nobody had been in here in weeks, otherwise I would have started to get really paranoid.

Anyway... school starts tomorrow.

Happy new year to everyone... I hope that 2007 is a better year for us personally and also for the world.

(5) Fri Jun 02 08:06:46 PST leaving las vegas:

I informed my workplace today that I will be leaving, effective August 4th. I was really nervous about the reaction because so far I have been a fairly integral part of a lot of our new projects, but everyone handled it very well (which was nice for me because I was afraid of major drama about it). I hate disappointing people, and I certainly didn't want people to feel like I have been ungenuine, but there was no way to not deliver the bad news, and delivering it now is better than later from the perspective of the company.

The good news is that I got in to UCLA for a masters in Computer Science -- I am so excited to be doing that instead of this, although both of us being in grad school is going to really put us in the hole for a long time.

A friend pointed it out that it is almost a year since I left NPU.

One of the things that has been really frustrating about this job is that I spend so much time doing things that we would have student workers do at NPU. I'm doing some cool things (we run Linux servers instead of Windows, for example) but most of the time I can't really work on cool stuff for those systems because I'm too busy helping people with email (non-)problems and the like. It's not that I think I'm "too good for it" or something, but my time would really be better spent working on challenging projects.

It has been a struggle to get an assistant/partner in here to help take some of the workload, but even then, we both spend most of our time working on fluff issues. What we really need is a 19 year old kid to work here to do all the grunt work.

Wed May 17 09:17:30 PST the dna kit is complete...:

... and they are human.

No time to explain.

Thu Apr 06 10:07:48 PST animal worship:

I think the natives here must be animal worshipers. In other, more primitive cultures, animal worship is often expressed by the wearing of animal skins and performing ritual acts as the animals in question. Not only do these beings wear animal skins, but with their advanced (yet medieval) technology, they actually perform sugery on themselves in order to emulate the features of some of their most revered gods. For example, the teeth of a horse, the beak of a bird, and the mammaries of a gurnsey cow. Fascinating.

Mon Jan 30 20:55:03 PST religion:

I am still trying to determine the natives religious beliefs. It all seems very pagan to me; some worshipping their transport vehicles, others pretending to be the undead. but I think that the most uniform religious pillar in this community is the worship of youth. It is clear that almost everyone in this place is obsessed with beauty and strength; many people have personal attendants (witch doctors) who try to help them stay "in shape" (the desired shape is not clear). some people even go so far as to drink elixirs made of crushed plants and fruits; these are supposed to alternatively cleanse or fortify, depending on their construction. visions of youth are everywhere; by contrast, the elderly are locked away in shabby towers where they won't be seen on the street.

certain elites in the community are well known for their youthful looks and good breeding; they are the paragons to which the locals must aspire. these paragons are so influential that the news of their comings and goings are front page fodder; they are clearly the royalty of this community. seeing them in person is apparently understood to be some kind of good luck charm; any time anyone enters a public place, all heads turn to see if the newcomer is one of these paragons -- and the expression of disappointment at the sight of a normal citizen is slight but consistent. Fascinating.

I've ordered some parts from a chemical supply company... hopefully my DNA testing kit will be complete soon.

Sun Jan 29 22:23:39 PST atmosphorming:

I went hiking in the large, sedimentary/morphic mountains near the metropolis today. Because they are obviously the ocean floor of a bygone era it's clear that there have been some cataclysmic earthquakes in this area. It boggles the mind that this civilization would choose to build in such a desolate, dangerous area. What's more mind-boggling is that they appear to dislike the natural proportion of oxygen in the atmosphere and have undertaken great pains to increase the carbon monoxide and particulate content of the local air to great success. From the mountains a you can see a kind of great pall floating over the city. I imagine that through millions of years the natives have grown to require this specialized atmosphere much like certain cockroaches require the electromagnetic fields of breaker boxes for effective reproduction...

(1) Fri Jan 27 21:33:31 PST stolen bandage:

I found a used bandage in the street today so I should be able to do some dna testing once I can cobble together a suitable testing kit.

The terraforming these creatures have undertaken is ambitious. it appears that there are no substantial fresh water sources nearby, yet i would imagine the metropolis holds nearly 10 million of the indigenous species... and fresh "water" (that's what they call the yellow liquid that comes from the tap) flows freely. they must be piping it in from somewhere. i can only imagine the "reverse terraforming" that's happening in those areas... i'll have to try to gain access to some of the drainage and waterworks and see what i can find...

Wed Jan 25 21:05:16 PST crash landed:

i'm not sure how i got here but i'm in some kind of strange new land... i think it's earth, late 20th century or possibly early 21st century. the locals are humanoid but I have not been able to determine if they are actually humans or if they just undergo surgery in order to appear that way. only dna testing will show for certain. i also can't quite make out the geography or geology... it is an arid land, but close to an immense ocean. i'll do some recon and report my findings to this journal. one thing's for sure... i'm definitely not in kansas anymore.

Fri Oct 28 09:55:02 PST road rage:

last night my coworker got his windshield fist-cracked by a dude with crazy road rage. i will now start locking my doors.

(1) Thu Oct 06 12:28:45 PST i've got a job and other news flashes:

I've got a job! Apparently the interview yesterday was a success from the client's perspective and I will be starting next week! The people from the hiring company told me that the client had actually looked around at some other candidates but didn't find anyone that was anywhere near as good a fit. I am super excited about the job, so that's cool.

In other news -- I am surprised by how little people here use their horns. In Chicago, if the light was green for half a second and you hadn't started rolling forward, people were honking. But on a scale of 1 to New York City with Chicago being a 7, I think that LA has to be a 3 or a 4. I don't know if I've been honked at once.

I was listening to the band Barenaked Ladies today, as a nostalgic romp back in time, and listening to them embarasses me a little, because I hear a lot of my own musical sensibilities that were shaped in early college when I listened to BNL a lot. Much of what I would like to cut out of my own musical stylings was put there (or amplified by) BNL. I don't even say that to dis them; I think they're great musicians and they put on a great show (at least they did in 1994 when I last saw them). But I don't want to be them.

Finally, our hot water is out. We're pushing about 36 hours with no hot water, but they are working on it. Our dishes are stacking up like lepers around the pool of Siloam, except that the pool is dry as a bone. Monday I heated water up on the stove to do dishes just like we used to a boy scout camp, but I'm not going to do that today.

Maybe the cold shower before the interview was what did it?

Thu Sep 22 12:55:11 PST waiting is the hardest part:

I'm waiting to hear about a Linux-related job that sounds really cool and I am extremely excited about. I'm also doing my homework for Computer Architecture, which I enjoy. It's fascinating to me how the elementary basics of binary computers are such valuable concepts, because literally everything inside a computer can be boiled down to those basic concepts. I find that learning those basics really assists you in learning at any level in the field. So that's cool.

We've been here in LA for over a month and a half now, and all this time I've been out of work ("on vacation"). I'd like to say that I was squeezing every last drop of life-giving freedom from these days, but when I'm honest about it, I can't really say that I have. Too much time surfing Wikipedia and the web in general, and not enough time making music or writing code. I have gotten a lot of constructive things done however, many projects which have been waiting for months to be picked up again, and I've been able to do a lot of housework and errands so that they didn't swallow our evenings when Anna is back from school. So maybe it's a wash. I'd like to have produced some tangible, important things in this month and a half, but I feel like instead I've produced a lot of intangible, small things. You can't be creative all the time, right? Anyway, that struggle is the story of my life.

Therefore, I'm going to get out of this chair and get my interview clothes ready in case they call.

(3) Fri Sep 16 01:40:11 food is expensive -- and other random thoughts:

I went to Quizno's tonight to get a regular sub combo and the total was $8.85 by the time it was done. Is that normal, people? I might as well eat out at a real restaurant if a Quizno's sub is going to set me back 10 bucks.

My Computer Architecture class is really interesting, although it is (understandably) a huge nerd-fest. I'm just one of the nerds, don't get me wrong... but wow. Nerds of all stripes.

Played Halo 2 with some friends in Chicago the other night... the Internet is great.

I also have a line on a job which is pretty exciting -- I'm really looking forward to seeing how this stuff pans out. I have enjoyed having a little "vacation" (or, as my mom said this summer, "You're not on vacation, you're *unemployed*!" -- hi mom!), but I'm just about ready to be back in the saddle doing something constructive and I've just about worked through the pile of "things I told people I would do but never got around to." I need a job so that pile can start growing again and I can get stressed out about it. Just kidding.

I have been really good at trusting God lately -- I feel like that's a major theme in my life; trusting that God will put me (and alhp) where we need to be, and give us the things we need to be there, if we are open to his leading. But I feel like, in being so trusting, I have let other areas of my spiritual life, like general prayer, or study, or just "quiet time" really fall by the wayside and I've been starting to feel a little needy in that regard. I haven't really talked about religion/faith much in this venue, but I'm a religious person and there's no point in hiding that here.

What else has been noteworthy? I'm sure a lot, but I guess that's it for now.

Thu Aug 11 19:57:12 the DMV in Santa Monica:

Went to the DMV today, without an appointment, and got both drivers licenses and both cars registered in CA. Not too shabby. The key was getting our number taken *before* we had to wait in line outside to get the cars VIN numbers inspected by a certified car VIN reader person. Then once we got back inside, we only had to wait about 20 minutes to see one person who handled everything for us. It was great to see one person who was drivers license, plates, cashier, judge, jury, and executioner all in one. So now we're really officially residents.

I had to run around the block to find an ATM since they didn't take credit cards (although the pamphlet with the Governator's picture in it said he made it easier to use credit cards at the DMV... not sure how.

Anyway, it worked out fine, and the lady who helped us was super awesome.

So, our last feature here at bread and cheese was the "will miss/won't miss" list. I think the new feature will be "That's Not How They Do It In Chicago!"

That's Not How They Do It In Chicago #1:

In Chicago, politican's names and faces are plastered everywhere. When you go to the DMV, you see Jesse White. When you go to the park, you see the commissioner's name. Richard M. Daley's name is everywhere. In LA, you see celebrities' faces and names instead. Restaurants, billboards, in your grocery store, and yes, even the DMV. I think that Arnold is the center of this Venn diagram -- he is both celebrity and politician.

(3) Wed Aug 10 14:38:03 the most dangerous game:

Went running in Topanga State Park (via Temescal Gateway Park) on the trail between Temescal and Will Rogers State Park with alhp. Pretty great trail, although I am having a hard time getting used to the dominant vegetation being scrub brush and cacti. I don't think I'm going to miss that when we finally leave.

M*A*S*H* was filmed in the Santa Monica mountains, and I have a feeling that I saw the mountains in the opening credits today -- or at least ones that looked so much like them that for the whole run (or run/walk since I'm so out of shape) I had the M*A*S*H* theme song stuck in my head.

Did you know: The M*A*S*H* theme song is titled "Suicide is Painless" and was written by director Robert Altman's son? The iMDB says that Mike Altman made more money off the royalties to that song than his dad made for directing the movie!

Anyway, it was driving me crazy. When I have a song stuck in my head while running, the pace of the song slips into rhythm with my breathing (which is in rhythm with my footsteps) and it makes me start to feel really claustrophobic. I tried my sister's tactic of singing "Hey, Jude" whenever she has something stuck in her head -- it works for me. The worst thing that could happen is that you don't get the first song out of your head. And the second worst thing that could happen is that you get "Hey, Jude" stuck in your head which, for me, isn't much of a punishment. That song is so long, there's tons to appreciate. There are the regular verses, then there's the bridge, then there's the na na na part, and then there's the part at the end (my personal favorite) where Paul sounds like he's being electrocuted whilst trying to sing the lyrics.

Did you know: if you're attacked by a mountain lion, you're supposed to fight back? The theory goes that mountain lions can't afford to be injured predators and so would rather let a meal go than get injured in a fight. Before fighting back though, you're supposed to be loud, look big, bare your teeth, throw stuff, pray, etc., and hope you don't have to remember your karate.

In Chicago, the most dangerous animal you might come into contact with is some random rabid mammal, or perhaps a pit bull or something. In LA however, the most dangerous animal you might come into contact with is a real live mountain lion. The kind with sharp fangs and claws whose M.O. is to leap on your back and sever your spinal cord as you run by. This freaks us out. Now, truth be told, no one has been killed in our area in 110 years and we're much more likely to be killed crossing the street -- but those cats are out there, and I have to say that I think I probably look pretty tasty.

Wed Aug 10 02:26:04 the eagle has landed:

Well, here we are in beautiful Los Angeles. Well, Pacific Palisades, really. We're living, yes, on Sunset Boulevard, which to non LA people sounds really funny and ridiculous (or maybe cool), but to LA people it just sounds normal. Saying that you live on Sunset in LA is like someone in Chicago saying that you live on Western Avenue. In Northern California (which split from Southern California after Emporer Norton I's death) saying that you live on Sunset Boulevard is slang for saying that you have infectious boils.

Incidentally, there is some argument as to what is actually the longest street in the world. Canada claims Yonge Street in Toronto to be the longest (at 1900km) and Guinness agrees, however this depends if you consider Yonge Street to be synonymous with Canada's Highway 11. If Settlers of Catan has taught me anything, it's that The Longest Road is an important asset. I have to believe that there's somewhere in America where I-80, or I-90, or US Hwy 2 is named "Bob Johnson Way" or something like that and so we can steal that crown jewel from Canada's, um... crown... jewels. But that said, Russia probably has Tchaikovsky Way from Moscow to the Bering Strait. which would beat us, so let's just let Canada have it.

Anyway, I digress. Yonge Street may be the longest consistently named roadway in the world (about 99km in Ontario before Highway 11 starts), but Western Avenue in Chicago is a continuous, arrow straight city street that stretches 23.5 miles (37.8 kilometers) within one city's limits. Canadians can't even hope to have that kind of city planning technology.